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So frustrated! How would you respond to this??

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So frustrated! How would you respond to this??

heyyouwannatrade

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Myself and another trader have been talking about a possible trade since last week. I told them what I had from their wants list and they proposed a multi trade (4 pins for 4 pins). I told them I needed to chat with my hubby first since I was doing this more for him than myself and I wanted to be sure he was happy with the trade. I was out of town for the weekend and told the person I would message them asap to let them know. They said that was fine and they would await my answer.

Yesterday I messaged them and said I had finally had some time to run it all by dh and he was happy with that trade offer. I get a message back that said that was great, went over the trade one last time and sent me the shipping info. We even had one more email making sure that all pins were still new and on the cards. So, everything is set. They seem excited about the trade and my dh and I are as well. I let them know I will package the pins and have them out right away. That is exactly what I did. I got offline, packaged all 4 pins up and went to bed. I got up this morning and went across town to ship them out. I come home to an email that says they have changed their mind now b/c "their spouse was not as crazy about the trade as they thought". All I can think is that I took the time to run it by mine before agreeing to the trade so that I could be sure before giving an answer. This person could not do the same for me? In those several days that went by while they waited for my answer they could not have checked to be sure on their end as well??

Here is what really bugs me about the whole thing... the person put these 4 pins up on ebay last night instead! Why tell somebody you are backing out b/c your spouse does not like the pins as much when really you just decided that you had rather ebay them??

So, my pins are out in the mail, I am out the money I spent to ship them and I have to wait now for this person to get them and send them back to me.

Has anyone else had this happen? How did you respond? I don't like to be rude to anyone but this just really gets under my skin. They are the ones who proposed this trade. I took my time to make sure I wanted to go forward with it but yet they back out after already agreeing. :(
 
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Wow, that was really rude of them. I've had to complete the trade when in hindsight, I probably shouldn't have, but I'd already made the deal. No one likes someone who backs out at the last minute. I've mailed the wrong pin, lost the pin before I shipped it and made other mistakes, but I always email the second I realize my error. It's embarassing for me and I always feel like they think I did it on purpose, but to actually back out then sell them - NO WAY!!! Leave them a bad reference and maybe they will learn.
 
If that was me Id be quite angry at that trader thats downright dirty of them to pull something like that as that it not fair on you and I hope you get your pins back from them and lets hope the pins on ebay dont sell to give them a lesson on cursity over pure greed.
 
Wow. I've never had that happen (thank goodness). Definitely bad form on their part. I would politely ask if they'll pay your shipping costs, but I wouldn't be surprised if they don't. Then I would avoid them like the plague.
 
I would be please, more than pleased, to have you pm me their name, so I can have the pleasure of not trading with them. Maybe if more people request their name to be pm'd to them, and no one is willing to trade with them, they MIGHT learn. Maybe not, but at least we can all defend you. :)

Vicki
 
I would also like the name of this person. Sorry this happened to you.
 
OMG how unprofessional of them I am soooooo sorry this happened to you and now you have to wait and see if they will even ship your pins back to you that is awful. I would like their name as well to add to my bad traders list. I think you should leave them a bad reference esp if they are on here. I make trades all the time that are not to my advantage and I have always honored the trade some people just dont care. Which 4 pins were you looking for maybe we all can help you out :)
 
Definitely, bad form!! **dyma shakes her head in disgust ** They probably thought you wouldn't figure out that they were posting the pins on Ebay. I'll appreciate a pm on the name also.
 
Thanks guys! I am glad to know I am not just feeling overly upset about it without good cause. The person has messaged me and said they were sorry as well as offered to refund the money I had to pay to ship to them but I have to be honest when I say that does not make me feel much better. Like some of you have said, the right thing to do is stick to a trade when you agree to it but I feel that they are so determined to now sell them that there are no other options. For them to say their spouse was not as crazy about the 4 pins as the person thought they would be does not make sense to me. If that were the case then #1, why are the pins on their wants list and #2, why not offer to at least try and work out another trade with getting different pins in return?? The person knew we really wanted these pins so to just back out all together was really crummy. I wonder how they would feel if somebody did that to them when they were excited about the trade only to find out they were backing out b/c they thought selling them was a better idea??!!

With that being said, I was able to go back to the post office this morning and even though I spent an hour there between waiting for somebody who had the time to look for the package and then them going to look for it I did finally get the package back just before it went out. I was so annoyed spending an hour up there today but I am happy that I don't have to wait for my package to come back now.

As for giving the persons name, I have been very careful not to say anything to give that person away simply b/c I don't want to ruin anyones trading reputation. The person is an active member here with several good trade ref's so that makes it hard for me to want to go out giving their name to everyone but at the same time I feel really annoyed that they did this and feel like I should let some people know. I am really torn on that. I don't want to be the "bad guy" for lack of a better word...lol

Tabitha, you are sweet! It would be nice to be able to get a trade together on some of them that would actually go through...haha The pins were some Toy Story Mania pins we had been looking to get.
 
I agree with caution on ruining someone's trading reputation however if you had known other ppl had a problem with this trader would you have agreed to a trade maybe maybe not I would like to know just for my own personal "Be cautious" list but I can respect if you dont want to give the name out either way I am sorry this happened to you :( If I have any of the pins you were looking for send me a PM and I will work out something with you (and stick to it ) lol
 
I understand being careful with other parties reps. Hopefully, the party will read this, understand that what they did was unacceptable, and realize should they repeat their behavior the rest of us will figure it out and -- well -- I'm sure they can figure out the rest of it. :)
 
People are just getting more and more rude. I feel like I was just jerked around because I spent time last night to take pictures of pins for someone and then they just dismiss the whole thing because they don't know if they are real or not. And it isn't even a pin with reported scrappers or counterfiets!!! That really torks me off because I get the feeling that the person ever had any intention of trading and just wanted to see pictures for comparison or whatever because I offered to send them! And I almost go the feeling like they were accusing me or something!!!

I'm just to the point now where the people who actually have the pins I want are the same people that are going on "the list" of people I don't want to deal with.....I'd much rather deal with ebay sellers than rude traders.... :(
 
WOW I would be angry also if I took pictures and then they blew me off. I agree there are many rude traders but there also ALOT of wonderful traders out there. Dont give up :)
 
I just made a site unseen deal and for my reference I asked for pictures. I would NEVER back out on any deal I had going unless it was beyond my control. There are way more good traders than bad but I understand it only takes one bad apple to spoil the barrel. Don't give up on trading just be cautious. If I can help anyone out please let me know. I don't want to see anyone give up a pin because someone ruined them. Keep on tradin' and someday you pins will come.
 
I find this unexcusable! And, I find it more disturbing that it was someone who posts on this forum! I think you should be able to add them to the "caution" list that is being kept. But, also, I would think more of them if they saw themselves in this post and came clean!!!
 
In all honesty,it may sound mean,but I'd buy one of the pins on ebay then leave negative feedback >_>

I'm glad I've never been yanked around like that online (besides ebay where I've been screwed many times).
 
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